Our Family

Our Family

Tuesday, November 6, 2012

Superwoman Syndrome

I am not Superwoman.  I cannot be all things to all people all the time.  I am not perfect.  I do NOT have an infinite amount of patience (that's something people assume when they see the size of my family and that I homeschool.)  And yet, even as I write this I know that I have Superwoman Syndrome.  I want to be able to be all things to all people all the times.  I want to be the perfect wife and mother.  I don't like to make mistakes. I don't like to feel like I've failed.  I get my feelings hurt very easily by other people especially when I am getting criticized.  I have a very hard time saying no to people when they ask me to do something, even when I am stretched beyond my limit and should not add anything extra to my overflowing load.

So for all the women with Superwoman Syndrome, we need to be more realistic.  We are not perfect.  Our children are not perfect.  A bill is going to be forgotten to get paid.  You will forget to give your son his medicine.  It may take 3 days before you remember to look at your son's Math.  Your child will at sometime have a meltdown over schoolwork.  They may even act rude or throw a temper tantrum in public.  Your husband may go to work with mismatched socks and there might be an endless supply of laundry on the back of the couch.  These things are not "failures."  It is life and no one can do it all all of the the time.

People are always going to criticize, or think they can do something better than you can.  That's one of the reasons I hate being in leadership positions because nobody else wants to be in charge, but everyone certainly can tell you when you are doing things wrong.  A wise lady once told me that if they think they can do it better, let them step up and take do it.  I need to remember that.  I put my whole heart into everything I do, and if someone thinks that is not enough and they can do it better,  more power to them.  Don't let people discourage you or make you feel inadequate.

The verse, "I can do all things through Christ that strengthens me," does not mean we should attempt to do all things.  It means He will  give us strength for the things He has given us, not all of the things we have given ourselves.  Even though it can be hard.  Even though we might upset people who we care about, sometimes you just have to say NO.  Being wives and mothers should always be the first and most important priority.  Homeschooling is another top priority.  When too many other things come in, those are the areas that suffer.  Even small things or commitments can cause havoc in a household that is already stretched.  Then there is the added stress of not just doing extra "things: but the scheduling and juggling that goes along with it.  Aaaahhhhhhhhhhh.  It gives me a headache just thinking about it.  I know for I need to learn to say NO to people , how about you?  Oh, and be mindful of asking other people to do things too, especially if you know they suffer from Superwoman Syndrome.

I leave you (and myself!!) with this thought, Who's approval should we be seeking?  We will never be Superwoman and will not ever be able to do it all.  But, we do need to look not for the approval of man but of God.

Am I now trying to win the approval of men, or of God? Or am I trying to please men? If I were still trying to please men, I would not be a servant of Christ.  Galatians 1:10.

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